Sleepwalking is for chumps - try sleep EATING

Ever get up in the middle of the night to get a snack and fall asleep eating it?

Didn't think so. Okay, then maybe it's just me. Because last nite at like 1 AM, I went downstairs to get some food. (And for the record, I BARELY remember doing this.)

All I know is, at 6:15 this morning, I felt something crawling on my leg and jumped out of bed like a little bitch. I grabbed a soft, flat object and threw it onto the floor. Then I went back to sleep.

A little while later I got into the shower. After I got dressed, I went to make my bed. And that's when I saw it. In the corner of my room was a big fat half eaten tortilla.

What - the - fuck.

It was at that point I realized my foot was stepping on something cold and sticky. I looked down and saw a big slice of turkey stuck to my heel.

A fucking turkey tortilla. And I didn't even finish eating it! I passed out mid-consumption.

Alright. Maybe this is why I shouldn't be posting anymore.

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THINGS I'VE LEARNED FROM STUFF I'VE DONE

I'm going to make some lucky woman VERY happy one day.